The Power of Love

25th May 2014

S1460034Exploring spirituality is a fascinating experience. It is always a personal journey because what we are exploring is ourselves: how we relate to the spiritual part of ourselves, the sense we make of it and how we express our spirituality in this world. However, we do have the opportunity to share our spiritual experiences with others. Sometimes this is through groups and meeting like-minded people. Sometimes it is with another person in a relationship.  When we feel safe in a relationship and trust in that relationship, then we open ourselves up more and more. This has the potential for a very powerful healing effect on us, particularly if we are already working with energy or healing in some way. Why is this? Let me explain.


Healers often talk about energy in terms of light and love. For me, these words are inter-changeable: the more in tune we become with ourselves, the more loving we become in the moment and therefore we feel lighter. We could swap the words around and say: the lighter we become in the moment, the more loving we feel. So what? Well, we all carry within ourselves insecurities, fears, anxieties, and other unexpressed troubles. We often hide away these vulnerabilities to make us feel safe and to enable us to face the world and the people in it. When we start to work with energy and healing, we bring light (also known as love!) to these hidden parts of ourselves. This brings to the surface the vulnerable feelings and the issues associated with them. We then have the opportunity to acknowledge what we have been carrying and to begin a process of healing.


These are always powerful opportunities for our personal development. For example, as a child someone learnt to withdraw from the world. They did this to feel safe and to avoid the difficult energies that so many people carry within themselves. As an adult they function perfectly well in life, but have difficulty connecting deeply with other people, especially in their closest relationships. Over time healing connects this person with the fear that they felt as a child and which led to the withdrawal. By acknowledging these feelings the person is then able to let go of them, instead of ignoring or suppressing them. This deepens their connection with life and with other people.


The same thing happens in our closest relationships. Whether love is present or absent, it is through our relationships that we each experience love in a way that is very specific to us. When love is present and we feel safe with someone, we start to open to that person and our vulnerabilities come to the surface. Sometimes this is a very conscious process; sometimes we are completely unaware of what is happening. For me this depends on how self-aware the person is. If they have done some personal development work or have learnt about themselves from previous relationships, then the greater self-awareness that results from this can be of tremendous benefit. When the feelings of insecurity or fear come up, the person recognizes that and instead of becoming that feeling, they step back from it. In doing they become the observer of the feeling: they do not suppress or become it. Of itself, this is very powerful. The next step is to share the insecurity or fear with the person they love. This can be scary but it is about taking control of the experience and the feelings that have kept us afraid. Voicing our fears creates an internal shift. We do take a risk that the person we love might react badly or even reject us for what we have said, but if we trust the love that we feel in the relationship then there should be a safe space to do this.


For me this is the Power of Love – to allow the love we give and receive in our relationships to touch each and every part of ourselves, not just the bits we feel most comfortable with. This takes courage. It also requires us to be unconditional with ourselves and with others. Sometimes this way of being is very gentle, sometimes it is very strong. That is the power of speaking and being in our truth. This requires us to be very clear with ourselves about who we are. We can then ask the question “can I accept this part of myself? How can I heal this part of myself and learn to live with it? Can I tell the people I love that this is part of who I am? Is it appropriate? If I tell them, will they accept this part of me and help me live with it?”


When we live from our truth then we are really in alignment with all of ourselves. Yes, difficult feelings and vulnerabilities will come up. But if we face them unconditionally and give these parts of ourselves the love that we can give so freely to others, then we can create change from deep within ourselves. Life is unconditional – there is beauty and there is ugliness; there is a cycle of life and death; there is the experience of love and there is the experience of fear. Yes, we can consciously create experiences that are more in alignment with love and the beauty that we see in life. However, for many human beings there is a need to accept that this is not all of they are. By seeing, feeling and then accepting the difficult parts of who we are, we reclaim the power that we use to suppress them. This gives us even more energy to work with in creating the lives that we want and in experiencing love in even greater depths. This is the Power of Love.

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